Happiness, yours, mine and ours?
Last Sunday was my birthday and it was so wonderful I just have to express how fortunate I am. I remember as a child (yes I can remember that far back 🙂 ) thinking that 40 or 50 was soooooooooooo old. Now at this ripe old age I know that it is only a number and has no relevance about how I feel about myself. As a matter of fact, without a doubt I am much happier with myself and my life than I ever have been before. How on earth did that happen? “With age comes wisdom” is a saying we have all heard before and now I know that it is true. I would not turn the clock back for all the smooth skin in the world. 🙂 Seriously, I feel so much more comfortable in my own skin and have way more confidence in myself and my abilities than ever before! I would have to say that the majority of time I am a pretty happy positive person and for that I am grateful but there are moments……….
I know you are asking, how did that happen? Partly it comes from within, how many times have I said “we are all responsible for our own happiness”. We cannot expect that someone else will make us happy, but people do affect us whether we want to admit it or not, we would not be human if they didn’t. This weekend was a big example of how people can affect our lives. As I said it was my birthday so maybe it added to the kindness that was bestowed upon me. But seriously if I was not loved and appreciated by my friends and family it would not have been the same. On Thursday my oldest son and his wife took time out his insanely busy schedule to come out and have lunch with me. I understand they have their own lives but I always am grateful for any time I get with them. On Saturday night my girlfriends shared an evening with me, on mass we chatted like silly schoolgirls and they ever so kindly put up with my excited babbling. 🙂 An unexpected friend dropped by and surprised me briefly which meant a whole lot to me as well. On Sunday morning my youngest son came over and made me a truly yummy breakfast and afterwards we strolled down to the Quay, parked ourselves in the sunshine and shared the crosswords, like we used to when we lived together and he showed me how to do the Sudoku puzzle (I was deeply touched). I had a couple of surprise birthday e-mails from some old dear friends, an impromptu walk along the seawall with another and the day was rounded out by a considerate friend and a truly lovely dinner out in the park . These may seem like everyday things but they are the moments that I treasure.
The next day I had an incredibly busy productive day that included a much anticipated event that promised to be amazing. For the first part it was, but unfortunately the ending was not quite what I thought it would be. I was completely blindsided and am still realing from the aftermath. The long and the short is that I understand that we are all responsible for our own happiness but something or someone can very often take the wind out of your sails when you least expect it, especially when you have no guard up (which I didn’t). Maybe I am not so smart after all. 🙂
It does not take that much to please me and random acts of kindness never go unnoticed. I don’t need a million dollars or the biggest house in the world, just the respect, love and appreciation of people that I are a part of my life. I learned along time ago that if you want to have great friends you have to be one and if you want the love and respect of your children you have to lead by example. I try to do that in all areas of my life but I know that I struggle sometimes when I don’t always understand everyone’s different opinions and thought process, but I do try to recognize that we are all unique and special in our own way. Just because they may think differently than we do does not mean that either one of us is right or wrong we are just different and it is up to both parties to find a respectful co-existance. I believe that if something or someone is important to you then together you should make every effort to find a way to work things out. It takes courage, respect, compassion, patience, and tenderness but both parties have to be willing, one person can not do it by themselves. If you don’t then maybe it wasn’t that important after all.