why are some men so ……

Men are constantly telling me that women in Van are unapproachable and women are telling me that men don’t approach them. So if both are true, no wonder we have difficulty meeting.  Both sides are waiting for the other side to make the first move.  In Europe or even the USA men approach women readily, (just as was the custom in years gone by) why have Vancouver men become so indolent?

Sheree Morgan Matchmaker 

  1. DavidyaDavidya03-05-2009

    Some men have the impression that in the days of liberation, women who are interested will approach. And sometimes they do. But most women still come from a history where they expect to be approached. Some do expect a bit of mind reading though. (laughs)

    Really, its a bit of a numbers game. Learn not to take it personally – there are any number of reasons a woman may be haughty or say no. Hang out with a diverse group and you’ll find ore options…

  2. DavidyaDavidya03-05-2009

    One other thing. If you keep telling yourself women are unapproachable, that’s what you’ll find. For the most part, we tend to get what we expect.

  3. KellyKelly03-15-2009

    The “dating game” is one that is difficult for many to get a true handle on. Women are considered unapproachable because of the man being turned down in the past or thinking they will be turned down by women again. Its all an “inner game” that men play with themselves rather than knowing the reality that there are women out there that might be interested.
    Often the environment in which the interactions take place have a lot to do with it. People want to socialize and end up at bars or pubs and like events that encourage people to base their attraction primarily on looks, it’s difficult to communicate in such environments. So the good looking woman gets approached by many many men and they cannot say yes to all. The majority of men will receive the resounding NO, which can be difficult for a man’s ego ~ hence why women are deemed unapproachable.
    Perhaps a big part of it is the poor choices that the men are making on who they approach to begin with. I have observed social events where a certain woman will receive the interest from many men, they swarm around her vying for her attention. So I don’t think men are necessarily shy about approaching women, its just the choice of whom they give it to. Unfortunately, this leaves a lot of other women sitting quietly waiting for men to approach them.
    The environment where people can be social and can communicate find a better success rate of finding attraction on other levels than looks or charisma in a very competetive environment.
    If Vancouver men differ from those in Europe or USA, then perhaps they are being more selective of their choices in whom they approach. Some men use the “shotgun” approach and will approach all with the hope that eventually one will say yes. Quality may not matter to them. Traditional methods might not work.

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